


Dinner Plans

by nchardak



Category: Marvel (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-01
Updated: 2012-07-01
Packaged: 2017-11-08 23:51:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/448922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nchardak/pseuds/nchardak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Superhero dinner hi-jinks and conversation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dinner Plans

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a short, silly fic I've had rolling around my head since I saw the movie and I had some questions regarding that last post-credits scene. Questions like, what did they talk about? What did they do after? How can Tony have never had shawarma before? How can so many people not have known what shawarma was prior to this movie? Has nobody had Mediterranean food before?
> 
> Pay no attention. In fact, it's best to just not even read this and go get a damn gyro instead.

"You said something about getting food?" Bruce asked Tony as he waited for the other man to pull some clothes out of the wreckage of a closet. He hung onto his already-borrowed pants resignedly. 

"I did. I want shawarma, I said. And I still do. It sounds amazing. Just the thing after beating an inter-dimensional army and an egomaniacal god," Tony tossed Bruce some clothes and left the bedroom to rejoin the others where they waited for SHIELD to finish packing up Loki. 

"Do not remove the gag," Thor was telling Maria Hill, "I will return him to Asgard on the morrow. He will not die of starvation or thirst before then. It is imperative that he is not allowed to communicate." 

He looked at his brother sadly. Loki shrugged, said gag already in place. He was cooperating with Hill as well, allowing her to place manacles around his wrists. Tony filed this sudden cooperation away for later study. Loki was beaten and surrounded by his enemies, but there was something about his mannerisms that suggested treachery. 

But Tony had other, more pressing concerns.

"Anyone else hungry?" he asked. 

The group looked at him wearily. Cap leaned against a wall, his shield dangling lazily from one arm. When he'd first met the man, Tony would have bet money that the Captain wouldn't ever get tired; or at least he wouldn't show it. All-day adrenaline played a number even on super-soldiers, it seemed. 

Hawkeye and Black Widow looked just as exhausted. Natasha had somehow gotten rocks in her boots and was unconcernedly barefoot amid the broken glass and rubble of Tony's living room emptying them out. Clint had an ice-pack pressed against his knee. 

Thor was the first to respond, "I would never turn down a victory feast, Man of Iron. And your Midgardian fare is delicious and varied; I sampled of it when I was last here."

"Hey, call me Tony, big guy. I mean, I've invited you into my open-air home and everything."

"I'm starving," Bruce said, coming around the wall that used to be Tony and Pepper's bedroom, "And Tony won't shut up about Shawarma, and that sounds amazing."

"Uh, will we be able to find one that's open?" Clint said, "Last I checked, the entire city had evacuated or was in hiding."

"You're not very positive," Tony said, fiddling with his phone, "there's a Middle-Eastern place just down the block, I'll call ahead. Table for six? Seven? You coming?" he indicated Loki, who frowned as Hill pulled him from the room surrounded by a half-dozen other agents, "Guess not. Just six then. Hi, Nadia, my friends and I were wondering if you guys were open? Oh, we don't mind a mess, we just got done saving the world; you know how it is, and we're starving. Until eight? Great. Thanks a bundle, Nadia."

Clint looked at Natasha, who finished slipping her boots back on and shrugged, "I told you how he was when I was undercover."

"How was I, Nat?" Tony asked, but he turned to Steve instead, "You coming, Captain?" 

Steve closed his eyes and opened them slowly, "Sure, I guess."

"Excellent. I'll steal a car from SHEILD. I think my garage door might be broken."

\--

"What I don't understand," said Natasha as she navigated the SUV filled with super-heroes through the rubble and dead alien-filled street, "Is how you, as a nearly fifty-year old billionaire -"

"Hey! Don't just give the whole farm away!"

"-who has not only done extensive business in the Middle-East, but has lived in both New York City and the greater L.A. area for the majority of your life, have never had shawarma."

"Listen, is that even your natural hair color?" 

Natasha parked the SUV neatly on the side of the road and looked back at Tony coolly, "Shawarma is just the meat inside a gyro or a pita, Stark. It's a beef and lamb mixture and the term 'shawarma' just refers to the way it's cooked, on a vertical rotisserie."

"Oh. Well, then I've had it before. Like, a thousand times."

"That sounds disgusting. Do you think they might have chicken?" asked Steve, eyeing the restaurant suspiciously. Tony rolled his eyes. 

"Your technologies are astounding," Thor said, "I find the thought of beef and lamb together a tantalizing prospect! Might they have any ale or mead at this establishment?"

They didn't, but they had mint iced tea, which Thor found almost as appealing. He was also impressed by the fries and Greek seasoning, and ordered a third pita after demolishing his first two within minutes. Bruce as well seemed singularly focused on his food, making up for the way Steve sat with his head in his hand like someone had kicked his puppy, picking at his chicken gyro. 

"So," Tony said, "what now?"

There was a moment of silence. 

"What do you mean?" Bruce said, pausing before taking another bite. 

"Well, us," Tony waved his hands around the table, "The Avengers! We just saved the world! Are we really just going to go back into the office next week and file our TPS reports; forget this happened?" 

"The Avengers Initiative was disbanded," Steve said from across the table, "Fury said as much; whomever's in charge wants to concentrate on weaponry and the military establishment rather than independent...actors...or whatever it is we are."

"And you're cool with that?" Tony said raising his eyebrows, "you danced the old tune for a minute back at the Helicarrier but the minute you learned they were using the Cube you dropped the whole 'good soldier' routine." 

"No, I'm not alright with it. But it's not my call."

Tony turned to Clint and Natasha, who had been eating steadily but listening as only spies and assassins can listen, "And the two of you?" 

"I'm a SHIELD agent," Natasha said, "I'm loyal to Fury, and he's never steered me wrong. But he's not the end-all of the organization." She raised her eyebrows at Tony, leaving a wealth unsaid. 

"I might be under arrest for murdering several people, so I don't know where I stand at all," said Clint, unconcerned, "Is brainwashing a legitimate defense I can use, or will I get put away for insanity?"

"What are you suggesting, Tony?" Bruce asked. That's why Tony liked the mild-mannered little scientist; he wasn't one to dance around the subject. He'd barrel right through it and then throw it against a wall for good measure. 

"Me? I'm not suggesting anything. I'm just saying that maybe we shouldn't lose each other's numbers. Maybe we should all get together for pizza and beer next week."

Silence greeted this proposal as everyone processed this.

"I return to Asgard tomorrow, to deliver my brother to our father for justice," said Thor, "And travel between realms is difficult right now, though it will be easier with the aid of the Tesseract. But I do intend on returning; I wish to see my beloved Jane Foster again." 

"Great! Bring her. She's a theoretical physicist, right? Great conversation. Let's everyone bring our girlfriends. Boyfriends," he said, looking at Natasha, "Or...girlfriends...?" 

She didn't even look at him, "My boyfriend is an ex-KGB covert-ops agent." 

"You have a boyfriend? Really? Awesome. Great conversation."

"I'm not bringing him."

"But you'll come?" 

She raised an eyebrow. He looked to Steve, who shrugged, "It's not like I'll have any plans anyway."

"Good," Tony said. He looked around at the disheveled group of oddly-dressed strangers who had just saved the world, "My place, next Saturday. Fury's not invited."


End file.
